Through extensive research I have found
that because of the way the brain is made, every time you sneeze, all of
the numbers in your head advance by one digit. The implications of this
fact are fascinating.
If you are skeptical about this, I think I can prove it is true if we
make a few assumptions as we think about it together.
Think of a low number and call it out. (I will assume that you called
out the number 8.) By this theory, before you sneezed the last time,
that number would have been 7.
Call out another number. (I will assume that you called out 15).
Excellent number! You have not sneezed since we were considering the
number 8 in the previous paragraph, so no numbers have moved forward and
15 is an accurate number.
Pick another low number that is higher than 15. (I will assume that you
called out 20.) Now hold that number for a moment.
What number do you get when you add the numbers 40 and 50? You get 90!
Correct?
Now, subtract your previously high number of 20 from 90—what number do
you get? That is correct, you get 70. At this rate, it will take you 70
more sneezes to get from 20 to 90. And that is just one straight-line
row of numbers in your head.
Get ready now. Here comes the blockbuster: just as that one row of
numbers advanced one digit per sneeze, ALL NUMBERS in your brain,
unilaterally, move forward one digit each time you sneeze. Think of it!
According to this theory, all numbers advance like a moving wall of
digits each time you sneeze.
As you keep sneezing, all the numbers keep advancing, simultaneously,
and they begin to bunch up in your pointed head. When they bunch up,
this could be the reason for your headaches. I feel sorry for you, but
this just illustrates that life is tough.
There are some actual facts you are dealing with here:
1) Sneezing is usually involuntary, and you will keep doing it.
2) A reasonable amount of sneezing is desirable because, the more you
sneeze, the higher numbers you will have in your brain.
3) The higher numbers you have to work with, the better you will be in
math. (If you only have low numbers, it is more difficult to work big
math problems that require large numbers and lots of them.)
This in my advice on the matter:
Sneeze as often as you can!
Run up the numbers in your brain as high as possible!
Maybe, one day you will be able to balance your checkbook! |
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